Happy Birthday, Vivian Sue!

It’s been 10 years.

10 years since we saw your precious face.

10 years since I held you, sang to you, talked to you.

10 years since we found out that we would only get you for a few short days.

10 years since a Vivian-shaped hole was left in our arms and hearts.

10 years since I sang this song as we remembered your short life on Earth. (And 10 years since I fell down the platform stairs after singing this song and made your mommy laugh.)

Since then I have held your brother, David, and cried as I realized how much he looked like you.

Since then I have watched your cousin, Ty, reach every milestone that you should have. He told me last week how you would have been his best friend cousin.

Since then I have rejoiced with your mom and dad as Drew and Gracie Daisy joined our family.

In heaven, are you growing up?

In heaven, are you watching us as we miss you?

Every year there are mornings when I wake up and the memory of you is so strong, the tears flow freely, my heart breaks all over again.

I look at your pictures – so many we took so we could remember you well.

2014-04-24 06.50.54 2014-04-24 06.47.49 2014-04-24 06.47.09 2014-04-24 06.47.00 2014-04-24 06.46.45 2014-04-24 06.46.37 222202_1080014561691_1382_n 227657_1080007361511_570_n


My arms still ache for your hugs.

My heart still breaks that I don’t get to see you grow up.

Yes, I know you are in heaven with Jesus, and your body is healed, but I can still be a little selfish and wish you could have been healed here so we could have had you longer, so we could have seen you grow up.

Yet, I know that isn’t how it played out, so I guess I will just have to treasure the days we had, the memories I have, and I will look at your pictures and remember your short and sweet life that changed us all.

I love and miss you my sweet Viv! You will forever be an irreplaceable part of our lives.

Vivian Sue Hammer
April 26, 2004 – May 2, 2004
Read Vivian’s Story Here



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