Today’s post is brought to you by my very own mother! She has some insight for us about parenting our children when they become adults. Thanks, mom, for your willingness to share your thoughts with us!
Parenting. That word holds a lot of responsibility not just for young adults having children, but for everyone who has ever had children. As a senior citizen, I still have a responsibility to parent my adult children and be an example for my grandchildren.
My husband and I did our very best to raise our three daughters to become independent and productive in society as adults. We endeavored to provide a Godly environment and spiritual foundation, but they all knew they had to make their own decision to serve the Lord. There were a few bumps in the road as they were spreading their wings, but I am so grateful and thankful they all made the decision to serve the Lord and are very involved in the things of God.
Here are some suggestions for making the transition from parenting children to parenting adult children:
- Love your adult children unconditionally.
- Build an ADULT relationship with them. Treat them as you would any other adult you were interacting with.
- MYOB. Mind your own business. They don’t need to hear you tell them the way YOU would do something.
- IF they ASK–offer your best counsel, but don’t be offended if they choose not to take it.
- Don’t HOVER–Let them live their own lives.
- ENJOY any times you get to be together. You never know if it will be the last.
- And, finally, Pray, Pray, Pray. EVERY DAY!!!
I have learned some of these thing by the way my parents parented me as an adult. My mother was the hovering kind….3-4 calls daily…being told I needed to lose weight… not sharing our joy when we found out we were expecting for the third time in 4 years…wanting to follow us to a new town when we moved 30 miles away for my husband’s employment…etc. I was a very frustrated adult being parented by my mother. I vowed I would not be that kind of parent to my children when they grew up. I have endeavored to follow the 7 steps I presented. I hope I have done my very best for them. I loved my mother, but was often frustrated, but that too changed the day she died in a tragic fall. That was 30 years ago and I still miss her.
Great wisdom. My parents were what you outlined in your list. I try to be the same with my son and family. I have to admit #3 is my weak point. Kinda goes along with learning to listen more and speak less. James 1:19 “… Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, …” Thank you for sharing. God bless you.
Thanks for sharing!!