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I have been turning this idea over and over in my head lately, mostly because I can’t seem to create any.


Work. Kids. Kids’ activities. Kids’ activities for which I need to be present. Husband. Home. Bills. Business. Fitness. Health. Cooking. Friends. Facebook. (We have to be honest, Facebook is a thing on the balance list.) Sleeping. Laundry. Netflix. (Yes, Netflix is a thing, too.) Running. Social life. (Wait – do I have a social life?) Hebrew. Did I mention Hebrew?

There’s probably more. I am sure I am forgetting something. I can’t keep all those plates spinning all the time. Some of them come crashing to the floor. Hard. And often. And when that happens, I tend to beat myself up. Hard. And often.

I like what Jen Hatmaker says about balance in her most recent book, For the Love:

If I had to recite the top questions I’m asked in interviews, conversations, and e-mails, certainly included would be this one: How do you balance work and family and community? And every time, I think: Do you even know me? Balance. It’s like a unicorn; we’ve heard about it, everyone talks about it and makes airbrushed T-shirts celebrating it, it seems super rad, but we haven’t actually seen one. I’m beginning to think it isn’t a thing. Here is part of the problem, girls: we’ve been sold a bill of goods. Back in the day, women didn’t run themselves ragged trying to achieve some impressively developed life in eight different categories. No one constructed fairy-tale childhoods for their spawn, developed an innate set of personal talents, fostered a stimulating and world-changing career, created stunning homes and yardscapes, provided homemade food for every meal (locally sourced, of course), kept all marriage fires burning, sustained meaningful relationships in various environments, carved out plenty of time for “self care,” served neighbors/ church/ world, and maintained a fulfilling, active relationship with Jesus our Lord and Savior. You can’t balance that job description.


She’s right, you know. Balance is like that mythical unicorn. It doesn’t exist. There will be times in our lives when we are more attentive to one or two areas of our lives and less attentive to others. And those areas will naturally change as our lives progress.

The problem comes when we start the ugly comparison game. This game was a losing one before social media, but has become downright destructive in the current online culture. We see everyone’s best posted on Facebook. We see all the great ways to be a wonderful parent, sexy wife, efficient worker, gourmet chef and bikini model all over Pinterest. We see everyone else’s selfies of girls nights out on Instagram. And when we do, we start comparing our lives to everyone else’s and assuming we fall short. But what we don’t realize is that we are only seeing a small sliver of everyone else’s life through a filtered lens. Sure, they may be doing a great job homeschooling their children, but behind closed doors could be suffering a severe bout of depression. Maybe they have a fantastic relationship with their husband, but they are struggling with an enormous debt load.

The point is that we all struggle with balance and none of us achieve it, or if we think we have, it lasts a millisecond and is gone. The real problem isn’t balance, but rather giving ourselves permission to focus on what is the most important and, to quote a song I am sure we are all tired of hearing, say “Let it go” to what isn’t on the top of the priority list right now.

For me right now that might mean that I have to study Hebrew instead of watching an episode (or 10) of House on Netflix. It might mean that I don’t get to go to the 50,000 in-home parties that my friends have because I have a volleyball game to watch or a PiYo class to teach. The important thing to remember is that we can’t do it all, and we shouldn’t put that kind of pressure on ourselves. Living a busy life with many commitments is hard. Living that same life under the shadow of constant guilt for not doing or being enough is impossible and eventually will take its toll.

So, take heart and remember that while the picture of the unicorn is beautiful, it is in fact fictional, just like the idea of balance in the life of a busy human being. Give yourself grace, stop with the guilt, and do your best at what is most important today. Tomorrow you can re-evaluate what needs to be most important then.


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One year ago this week I started a journey with PiYo, 21-Day Fix and Shakeology that has brought me here. My story in video form is posted below and here is some photographic evidence of my transformation.

PiYo Transformation


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Food & Fitness Friday


That is all I have to say this morning.

After two months of 21-Day Fix workouts, I started PiYo again this week.

And I am feeling it.

But it helps me to remember that it is GOOD to switch things up. Different exercise routines use different muscles in different ways. When you do the same thing over and over again, your body gets used to it, so switching things up helps your body continue to work and get fit in new, and sometimes painful, ways.

So if you see me walking like an old woman whose hips are sore today, you will know why.

And even though I am sore, it is a happy sore, because that means what I am doing is working.

And working is progress! Progress toward being more fit. Progress toward my weight loss goals. Progress toward a stronger body.

And I like it!!!


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Parenting is hard. It is constant work. You can’t let it slide. You can’t assume it is happening. You have to work to be on your toes and aware of what is happening with your kids.

And we all fall short of that ideal. Often.

Some days we are lucky if we get them out of bed and off to school, never mind making sure homework is done, they have had a healthy breakfast and they remembered to brush their teeth.

But the purpose in me blogging for 31 Days this month isn’t to make it seem like I have it all together when it comes to parenting. It isn’t that I have all the answers. It isn’t that I think I am doing a fabulous job in every possible area. It is really that I want to share my experiences and hopefully inspire someone to take that extra step, put in that extra work, and in the process, that I will also be inspired to be better and do better.

This is how it is in every area of my life that I put out there on my blog.

I talk about depression in hopes that someone else can get the help that they need.

I talk about health and fitness so others can find encouragement to get healthy.

I talk about giving to others, so that someone might be inspired to give of themselves.

I talk about music because of its ability to lift us up and move us forward.

I talk about faith because it is the ultimate inspiration in my life.

I truly want to inspire YOU to be the best YOU, the one created and loved by God.

Put in the work, be inspired by others, and be the best parent you can possibly be to the children that God has given to you.

You can do it. I believe in you.


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Healthy Kids

Eat your vegetables.

Get up from the couch and go play outside.

No, you can’t have candy at 8:00 in the morning!

Yes, we are walking to the store, we don’t need to take the car to go six blocks when we just need three things.

These are the kinds of things you might hear me say at my house.

My kids are used to it. Because I eat a vegan diet and they do not, sometimes they don’t like what I make for dinner. Because it is full of vegetables. But they have to eat it anyway.

They are usually pretty good about staying active. It helps that I can’t get Anne off the trampoline and can’t get Ty to sit still for more than about a minute at a time.

But sometimes, they get lazy. They don’t want to walk to the store. They don’t want to ride their bikes to the pool (a rule I instituted this summer – bike to the pool every day!) They don’t want to get an apple out of the refrigerator, but it is ok to get the bag of chips out of the basket next to the refrigerator.

Last night, after we watched last week’s Biggest Loser (that my classmate from Greenville College is on this season), the kids and I had a little discussion about health and fitness.

We talked about the fact that I was always thin like they are – until I got to college and stopped running regularly, started eating more junk food, and let’s be honest, drinking some beer.

Because I upped my calorie intake while slowing my fitness output, I started gaining weight. It wasn’t long and my size 10/11 body was wearing stretchy pants in size 18/20.

The thing is, I didn’t necessarily know why I was gaining weight. I had never really thought about what I ate – and didn’t need to because I was active.

Next came a comfortable relationship that turned into marriage and two pregnancies. Anyone with young kids knows that finding time to exercise and eat well with little ones is a struggle.

But then I got fed up and felt like the Lord was prompting me to do something. So I started eating better and exercising. I lost weight, but eventually I quit trying and put it back on. And then I did it again. And again. And again.

And then something changed. I started educating myself. I started reading books, blogs, and articles about healthy eating and exercise. I started watching documentaries about healthy eating and exercise. I started living out what I knew to be right and good for me.

And you know what? Now if I stop (like when I had a knee injury and surgery this spring) something in me feels totally off and I can’t wait to get back on track. If I have a day where I eat something I shouldn’t, I can tell! I feel sluggish and gross and can’t wait to get back to eating the way my body wants to eat.

But I can’t keep this all to myself. As I get more education about nutrition and fitness, I have to pass that along to my children so that they understand the importance of fueling their bodies appropriately and keeping them active. If I don’t teach them these principles now, then they will have to learn the hard way, the way I have had to learn, later.

I have to help Anne fight her tendency to want candy all the time.

I have to help Ty understand that the copious amount of bread he consumes slathered in peanut butter shouldn’t be his go-to meal.

I have to help them both learn that if you can walk or bike instead of drive, you should.

I have to teach them that if it comes in a box, it probably isn’t the best choice.

I want them to see with their own eyes the importance of taking control of what goes into their bodies, and how to keep their bodies fit and healthy.

I want to be an example to them, yes, but more so, I want them to be participants in their own health. Starting now.


Not sure where to start? Here are some documentaries (and their corresponding websites) about food that might be a good place to start the conversation:

As with all things, you need to do your research and not always just take the word of someone else just because they are on TV, write a book, or write a blog. Be your own health advocate, and your children’s!!


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I have never watched The Biggest Loser before. I know, people have told me that it is good, and inspiring, and yadda, yadda, yadda, but I didn’t need one more show to watch.

But this year a classmate of mine from college, Sonya Jones, is on the show, so of course I want to watch her succeed and I have now watched the first two episodes of the season.

You all know that I have been on a health and fitness journey for quite some time (and I plan for it to continue for the rest of my life), so it always inspires me to watch other people “get it.”

Last night’s episode of The Biggest Loser showed the contestants the importance of owning what it is in their lives that got them to this point, and the fact that until they deal with those underlying issues, they will not have success in losing the weight AND keeping it off.

I think we all know this on a surface level, but how often do we actually do the work to deal with those deep-seated issues that have kept us complacent for too long?

I went to bed thinking about this and thinking about all the things that have to come together to make the difference between temporary change and lasting commitment.

Just like to be truly fit and healthy you can’t focus on only diet OR exercise, you also can’t expect diet and exercise to magically make the underlying issues for being unhealthy to disappear. Whether it is seeing food as a reward rather than sustenance, or a traumatic event that hasn’t been fully death with, or baggage from your family of origin, or something else altogether, the underlying issues must be unearthed and dealt with if there is to be any lasting change.

I know for me, I have had to specifically remind myself (often) that I cannot allow food to be a “treat” or something I “deserve” when I accomplish something, because that works against my health. In addition, I have to work on not perpetuating this “reward” way of thinking in my family since one of the ways I tend to show love is to cook or bake special things for them.

And as with anything, there probably is not only one underlying cause for what has happened to get you to where you are right now, so unearthing the issues could take some time, and possibly even some time with a therapist. And that is okay. In fact, it is better than okay. It is good when you get to a point that you know you need to seek out help from someone else.

Now is the time to stop making excuses and start making progress toward a goal. It could be a health and fitness goal, but it could also be something completely different. No matter what it is, figure out what has been holding you back and deal with it so you can move on – forever.


If health and fitness is your goal, I would love to help you achieve it. Message me for more information about your health and fitness options. The time to start is NOW!




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