Tag: son

21 Days of Prayer Recap

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Some of you may remember that the in month of October, I committed specifically to pray for Ty for 21 days using the Praying for Boys: Asking God for the Things They Need Most and the MOB (Mothers of Boys) Society Blog.

Well, I did it. Some days were better than others, but I did it.

The book was a great resource, and in addition to reading the chapters and praying through the provided prayers, I typed up the prayers and taped each day’s onto Ty’s door, so as I walk by, I can read a prayer or two.

But as with anything that you are committing to do, whether that be prayer, exercise, eating right, keeping your house clean, etc., it is in these moments that you will find yourself most challenged.

October was a rough month with my son. Fifth grade is kicking my behind. A new lack of responsibility has popped up, along with a sometimes super-emotional boy that I have never seen before. Disrespect and disobedience has reached a previously unattained level. Focus is a rare occurrence, and the desire for self-indulgence rather than self-sacrifice is rearing its ugly head.

There have been days when I just wanted to bang my head against a brick wall because that is what it feels like I am doing all of the time.

But, what I am realizing through all of this is the fact that when I take up the work of praying for my children in a more concentrated way, there is going to be a battle in the spiritual realm for their hearts. And I plan to win that battle with the Lord’s help. I will not give up. I will not allow these things that are trying to grab hold of my son to get a grip on him. I will continue to pray. I will continue to work with him. I will continue to fight for his heart and soul to be fully overtaken with the Spirit of God and not the spirit of the evil one.

It may not be easy, but it is necessary.

In Common

I am the oldest of three GIRLS. I like girly things. I have no trouble at all relating to my DAUGHTER. We can go shopping, watch a girly movie, do our nails, just hang out, whatever. It is no problem finding areas in which we can connect. It is natural to me because I am a girl who grew up with other girls.

Now, Ty, on the other hand is a BOY. And yes, I married a boy, but that doesn’t mean I know anything about how to raise one.

I mean, who knew that around fifth grade boys get emotional. This bursting into tears at the most random times I expected from my GIRL, not from my BOY!

All along I have tried to figure out how to find ways to connect with my son. I don’t really get into trucks, Legos, Star Wars, strange cartoons (Pokemon? The Last Airbender? The Clone Wars?), and all those other things that are “boy” for fun. But that isn’t an excuse to just not connect with my son.

I need to be able to have fun, create special memories, facilitate conversation, and get to know him for him, even though it is totally different from the way I can do it with Anne.

So, guess what? I have watched Star Wars (1-6) more than I ever dreamed possible, and spent just as many hours hearing the detail of every character involved as well as all about George Lucas (and now the sale to Disney and the upcoming movie). I have learned what Lego sets are acceptable and which ones are not. I have learned more than I ever cared to know about this thing called Minecraft. I have spent countless hours watching Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., even though it wouldn’t be my number one pick of television shows to watch. And that is just the tip of the iceberg.

I am choosing to find (and make) common places for my son and I to interact. Yes, there are some more natural ones that we both enjoy like riding bikes, but these common places are less about what I like, and more about what I can to do show my son that I want to spend time with him doing what he enjoys. I am even planning to take him indoor rock-climbing this fall, because that is something that he has been wanting to try. And let’s be honest, I work out a lot, but I am scared that I am going to make a fool of myself trying to climb a rock wall. But I am willing to give it a try if it means a day with my son doing something that he will enjoy.

Finding these common places with the child(ren) you don’t relate to as easily is hard. It takes work. It takes selflessness. But it is necessary and needed.

What are some ways that you have worked to relate to your child(ren)?