Category: Listening

Sweet Little Lies

This morning I am thinking about the little lies we tell ourselves.

Here is the context.

When I run, there are some days when it is easier than others. Some days I push harder than others. Some days just plain stink. But it doesn’t matter which of these is true for me to lie to myself. I may tell myself that if I could just get to the stop sign, then I could walk, knowing full well that when I get to the stop sign I won’t let myself walk. And there are a couple of hills that kick my butt every time, but instead of them being my nemesis, I convince myself that they are my friend and we are just running along together. I’m still struggling at the top of the hill, so it hasn’t changed anything at all except my ability to push myself through that tough spot. Probably the best one that I tell myself is when I am in bed –Ā  that when I get up and go for a run, it will be easy. But it’s never easy to start. And yet, these things I tell myself, that some other part of my brain totally knows aren’t true, work. They help me push through the tough stuff, they convince me to keep going. It blows my mind that it actually works.

Sometimes I tell myself lies in other areas, too. Even though my stomach is growling and I want to eat everything in sight, I tell myself I am not hungry and can wait for lunch. šŸ™‚

As a fun Thursday post, I am curious what lies you tell yourself throughout the day, just to get through. Yes, there are some lies we tell ourselves that aren’t good and may actually be detrimental to ourselves, but those aren’t the ones I am concerned about today.

What sweet little lies do you tell yourself?

(And yes, I am totally singing “Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies. Tell me lies, tell me, tell me lies” in my head thanks to the title of this post. So if you are singing it now and need to hear the whole song, here it is.)

We Need One Another

I am reading a book (surprise, surprise!) called Mile Markers by Kristin Armstrong, and I love it. I keep finding little gems in it that translate into many areas of my life, not just running. Last night it was this one:

We Need Each Other

I love it and it is so true! We do need each other. We don’t live in isolation and we shouldn’t. Each of us brings something different to the table and because of that we can help one another to do things that we couldn’t do on our own. This is true for our faith, raising children, running, the stuff of everyday life and so much more. Each of us brings different perspectives to life. We bring different personalities, different thought processes, different strengths, different weaknesses. We need each other to help talk and think through issues of life and faith. We need each other to open doors to us that we might not open ourselves. We need community.

This is why I run with friends. This is why I meet every Sunday with a small group. This is why I meet with a close friend to study a book weekly. This is why I meet twice a month with another friend for lunch. This is why I meet with a Virtual Community Group monthly.

We need each other. We can’t do it on our own. So, today, spend some time being thankful for the community around you and maybe even specifically thank those who you count on most. And if you don’t have community, I encourage you to find it. Ask your church about joining a small group. Reach out to someone you have been wanting to get to know and ask them to lunch. Find a family that you can plan a monthly play date with.

What does your community look like?

Love Challenge: The Results

Back on January 30, I challenged you to do something special for your spouse (or child, or friend) for each of the first 14 days of February. Now I want to know how it went. Here are the things I did for Mike:

  • February 1: Sent a special text message thanking him for taking such good care of our family, even when it means doing some things he doesn’t really want to do.
  • February 2: Bought him a bag of sugar-free York Peppermint Patties – one of his favorites in the regular version – since we are on a sugar fast.
  • February 3: Left a note on his pillow with a special scripture and prayer I prayed just for him. (He told me that this was his favorite thing I did.)
  • February 4: I felt sick and wanted to go to bed very badly, but instead, I sat with him on the couch and watched basketball. šŸ™‚
  • February 5: Left a note on his steering wheel.
  • February 6: Went to the store over my lunch hour to get Mike the hot dogs he wanted for dinner so he didn’t have to do it after being asleep all day.
  • February 7: Did not turn on my computer or check my phone all evening while I sat on the couch with him. (This is a BIG deal for me – I am BAD about doing this all the time.)
  • February 8: Left a note in his lunchbox.
  • February 9: Created an intimate encounter. (This was his second favorite. No surprise there!)
  • February 10: Took him on a date to the church’s Date Night Challenge.
  • February 11: Took him out to one of his favorite restaurants for dinner (without kids).
  • February 12: I was tired. I ran 16 miles. But instead of making him go to the store, I let him continue to lay on the couch and I went.
  • February 13: Today I thought ahead and actually bought a Valentine’s card for him. šŸ™‚
  • February 14: Made him one of his favorite meals – meatloaf and orange gravy.

Some of these things were obvious and some were more subtle. Some were easy and some were hard. Sometimes he showed appreciation, and other times he didn’t. But no matter what, it was fun (and challenging) to think about doing something special for him every day, and made me more aware of him and trying to do things that he would enjoy, rather than what I would like. It even helped change my attitude on those days where I was tempted to be frustrated with him or a bit whiny and self-absorbed.

I decided every day is hard, and some days I just don’t have that much creativity, but I also decided that at least once a week I need to be thinking ahead and doing something intentional for him, so that is what I am planning to do!

What are your stories? What are some of your ideas? I would love to hear about them. Has this inspired you to keep going or set any other goals along these lines?

Training

Yesterday, I reached the half-way point in training for a marathon – week 9 of 18 is complete. What that really means is I ran 16 miles. Sixteen of the 26.2 to come on April 15. Only 4 more 1-mile increases in the long runs – up to 20. And you know what is significant about that? I felt GREAT! I have done 7 half-marathons (13.1 miles) and I felt better after 16 miles yesterday than I have after most of the half-marathons I have done. And I can only attribute it to two things:

  1. God’s grace.
  2. Training.

I have been running consistently for quite some time, but to a higher level of consistency over the past year and a half. I have been pushing up from regular runs of 3 miles to regular runs of 5 miles. I have been pushing my speed on those shorter runs. I have been following a set training schedule as consistently as possible for the last nine weeks, lifting two days a week, running two shorter, one mid-size, and one long run each week. I have been eating carefully and healthily. I have been reading books about marathon training to get ideas that will help. I have made this training a priority in my life. And I have found that it is working! I am running farther at faster paces. I am feeling good after my runs. I am enjoying the process, even on tough days. I am finding that when it gets hard and I push through, I am not only becoming a better runner, but my character is growing as well.

And this has gotten me thinking about training ourselves in other areas of our lives. Is making time for the Lord hard for you? Set yourself a training schedule and stick to it. Do you want a stronger marriage? Make a plan for how you can get there and then follow-through. Is family time lacking in your house? Re-orient your schedule and write your family in.

One of the things that really helps for me is to actually schedule time for all of these things. I know that I will be working out every weekday morning at 5 or 5:30 (depending on distance) and I have friends that I meet who hold me accountable to that. I schedule every evening before bed to spend time doing my devotions, praying and writing in my journal. Every Tuesday night at our house is scheduled as Family Game Night (the evening may vary year-to-year, but we make this a priority in our house.) Mike and I have a standing “date” to go away for our anniversary and make an effort to have regular times together throughout the year as well.

By verbalizing our priorities and scheduling our time, we are in essence training ourselves to get better and to grow in certain areas. And training works! You do get better. You do improve. That doesn’t mean there won’t be setbacks, but when there are, you get back up and get going again.

What areas do you need training in?

Smile!

We all know what a difference a smile makes. We’d much rather deal with a smiling customer service agent than a scowling one. Smiling at our children, our spouse, or our friends and getting a smile back makes both parties feel good. And have you ever been smiled at by a baby? What a great feeling that is!

But I have noticed something about smiling this week that makes a huge difference in me.

Smiling when I don’t feel like it.

Smiling when no one is going to see it.

I noticed it most recently on my runs this week. We run early in the morning. The sun isn’t up and it is cold. And some days are easier than others. But every time I would start to feel discouraged, I would choose to smile, and when I did, instead of the thoughts of, “I can’t do this, I am so tired, my legs are so cold,” (and on and on and on), my thoughts switched to, “you’ve got this, this hill is nothing, you feel great, you are keeping a good pace, your breathing is perfect, you only have X more miles to go.” And no one saw me smile. There was no inward thing making me smile. It was simply a choice to smile.

Then at work one morning I was talking with a co-worker about a less-than-ideal situation and before she left my office, I told her I was just going to smile even though I didn’t feel like it. And you know what, it made a change in my attitude about the situation.

Then last night, as I was cleaning up my disaster of a house that was created by the other people who live in my house and not me, I could feel myself getting frustrated about it. But instead of getting angry and muttering under my breath (or out loud, they were gone, they wouldn’t have heard me), I chose to smile instead. And guess what? That’s right, no more angry thoughts, no more frustration. My attitude was changed.

We often talk about how smiles are powerful when we give them to others and that is true, but I think sometimes we discount how powerful they can be for ourselves. Just choosing to smile when you don’t feel like it. Choosing to smile when your attitude needs changing. Choosing to smile when it feels like screaming at the top of your lungs would feel better.

So, no matter what is going on in your life today, I challenge you to smile through it. Not a fake smile or a forced one, but a genuine, attitude-changing, smile. Let me know how it works!

Have you ever noticed this before?

Bragging

Today, I am just gonna brag a little.

Not about myself.

Not about my husband.

Not about my kids.

Not about my cats.

Today I am going to brag about my God.

Here is just a sampling of why I am bragging on Him today.

  • He shows me things during my devotional time that I can’t get out of my head and I think about for weeks at a time.
  • He uses those things to craft in me ideas and thoughts that are not my own.
  • He uses me to share those insights with others who need to hear that message.
  • His Spirit flows through me as I sit on my couch with my computer writing a sermon that I couldn’t come up with on my own.
  • Then He does it again when I leave the printed copy of my sermon at home (at which point I panicked and got a friend to save it as a .pdf so I could open it on my phone, and then while preaching twice, I didn’t look at my phone even once).
  • He uses even my (stupidity, forgetfulness, busyness, whatever) to teach me that it isn’t about me or how well prepared I feel, but about Him and how His Spirit can move and use me to get His message across.

There is so much more I could brag about–His protection, His provision, His love, His gifts, His grace, His mercy– the list could go on and on, but these are the things that have happened to me in the last week or two that I have been very aware of and in tune to Him and the way He works.

So, there it is, some of the many reasons that I am bragging on God today.

What are you bragging on Him about? I’d love to hear!

I Need You

So, the Love Challenge has my mind going 100 miles an hour trying to figure out the best ways to show Mike that I love him. (And he only reads my blog every couple of months, so I am hoping he doesn’t read this until AFTER the challenge is over. :)). While I was thinking about what I am going to do today, I was reminded of this song, I Need You, by Tim McGraw and Faith Hill.

The idea that there are certain things that I need Mike to help me battle (not whiskey and cigarettes, like Tim’s verse, but other things), is true. There are certain things that help me cope with life that he provides. I need him. The thing is, our lives often get so busy that we forget that we need one another to get through. We begin to think we can do it all on our own.

The same thing is true of the Lord. We need Him. We can’t do it on our own, but we try. And it isn’t long before we find out that we can’t do it all on our own. But sometimes, our pride won’t let us go and ask for the help we need at that point. We continue to try to tough it out until we are so beat down, so immersed in our problems, that we feel like we’ll never get out.

But all it takes is for us to swallow our pride and admit we need help. We need our spouses. We need our God. We need our friends. We need to do life together in community. We are not meant to be solitary individuals, but part of a larger whole where we all need one another.

And when we recognize that we need one another and we need the Lord, we also recognize that life isn’t all about “me.”

So, who do you need today? Where do you need to swallow some pride and admit that you can’t do it all on your own?

Love Challenge

First off, this is not an original idea, I borrowed it from the ladies at Leading and Loving it. You can read their post here. But, I loved the idea so much that I thought I would offer the challenge to you, my readers, as well!

In November, I challenged you to find something to be thankful for each day.

February begins in two days, and this time, I want to challenge you to do something special for your spouse every day for the first two weeks of February, leading up to Valentine’s Day (or the whole month if you are feeling it!).

It doesn’t have to be anything big (but it could be). It could be fixing their favorite dinner. It could be getting a sitter and going out on a date. It could be buying them a little special something. It could be sitting with them on the couch to watch a movie. It could be taking a walk with them. It could be planning an intimate encounter. The sky (and your creativity) is the limit!

Don’t have a spouse or aren’t in a relationship? No big deal, you can participate, too. Do it for your kids, your parents, your best friend, or someone you know who needs a little extra love poured out on them this time of year.

Be creative. Be spontaneous. Show love in a tangible way. My guess is that not only will you be blessing someone else you will be blessed in the process.

So, are you in? If so, leave a comment below. At the end of the two weeks, I’ll ask you to share some of your most creative Love Challenge ideas.

Sticks and Stones…

I’ve been doing quite a bit of thinking lately about words. Words that we say to ourselves. Words that we say to others. Words that we hear from others. Words that have power.

We all know that the saying, “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me” is one of the most untrue statements in the world. Whoever changed that to “…but words can hurt the most” made it much more accurate.

Words can hurt. Words can heal. Words can encourage. Words can destroy. The power of a single word is so strong, and yet, we tend to let our words fly without any concern for how they sound or what they are doing to the person they are directed to.

There are a few different areas in which the power of words has become very apparent to me lately.

  1. When I am running and I am tired, sometimes the difference between finishing a run and having to walk comes down to the words I am telling myself. If I am rehearsing how tired I feel, how my legs feel like lead, how my breathing is struggling, etc., you can bet that I will be walking soon. But if I am saying to myself that I have this, I can do this, I am a strong runner, my lungs are feeling good, etc., it is amazing how much strength and energy that gives me and I can finish the run.
  2. When you have kids, particularly a daughter that is 11 and the change from a smile to tears happens in a nanosecond, you quickly realize that your words make a huge difference in how quickly the tears change back to a smile. I am finding that I have to be very careful in how I respond to her these days and am trying to use words that build her up and encourage her in this time of her life that is scary and constantly changing.
  3. When life is difficult, we often tend to commiserate with others about how hard things are. But, if we would instead talk about the things that are going well, and look for those things that are positive in our lives, our attitudes would be greatly different, even about the hard stuff. It’s easy to wallow. It’s hard to rise above it. But if we choose to speak those positive words, we would notice an overall change in our outlook.

There are many other areas where our words are important: how we speak to our friends, co-workers, spouses, etc. It is so important for us to speak positive, encouraging words that build up rather than tear down, whether it be for ourselves or those around us. Yet it is so hard sometimes. But that is when we need to pray Psalm 141:3, “Set a guard over my mouth, O LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips,” and we need to make sure that what is going into us is positive so that what is coming out is positive as well.

Let’s work on that together.

When is it hardest for you to speak words that encourage?

Growth Opportunity

Over Christmas my mom gave me a book filled with short daily readings that her aunt had given her last year. She really enjoyed reading it and thought I would too. It is called Jesus Calling: Enjoying Peace in His Presence by Sarah Young. Since I do my devotional/Bible reading at night before bed, I thought this would be perfect for something quick in the morning. Each day consists of a short paragraph or two, written as if Jesus were talking directly to you. It is based on scripture that she provides the references for at the bottom, so you could look them up if you choose.

It has been amazing to me how some (many) of the days have been exactly what I needed for that day. But none so much as Sunday.

I have been struggling. I am training for this marathon that is coming up in April and am feeling like between some asthma/breathing issues, scheduling, and weather it has just been very difficult to get my training runs in the last couple of weeks. And that is frustrating. And it makes me scared that I won’t be ready for the race. So Sunday morning when I got up, anticipating another long run in the afternoon and wondering if I was going to be able to do it, here is what I read:

Strive to trust Me in more and more areas of your life. Anything that tends to make you anxious is a growth opportunity. Instead of running away from these challenges, embrace them, eager to gain all the blessings I have hidden in the difficulties. If you believe that I am sovereign over every aspect of your life, it is possible to trust me in all situations. Don’t waste energy regretting the way things are or thinking about what might have been. Start at the present moment–accepting things exactly as they are–and search for My way in the midst of those circumstances.

Trust is like a staff you lean on, as you journey uphill with Me. If you are trusting in Me consistently, the staff will bear as much of your weight as needed. Lean on, trust, and be confident in Me with all your heart and mind. (Psalm 52:8; Proverbs 3:5-6 AMP)

Talk about exactly what I needed. Every single sentence I read (and have read over and over again) went straight to my heart.

  • Issues with training making me anxious = growth opportunity.
  • Embrace the challenge = gain blessings.
  • Belief God is sovereign = trust Him in ALL situations – even running.
  • Don’t worry about the past, look at right now and God’s way.
  • Lean on Him and let Him bear the weight. (This is a great one to think about when I am spent during a run.)

And while nothing has changed–my breathing has good and bad days, the weather is just crappy this time of year in southern Illinois, we lead a busy life–my attitude has. I am choosing to not be fearful about it. I am embracing the challenges and knowing that it won’t be easy (if it was – everyone would do it!), I am believing that God is with me on each and every run and I can call out to Him for His help and strength when I feel weak. It doesn’t matter if I had a bad run last week or missed one due to weather, I have today to try again.

And what a difference it is making to hold on to these promises when I am tired, struggling to breathe, freezing, etc. I guess that means I am taking this opportunity to grow!

As you read this today, is there an area of your life that you can apply it to? What is it and what kind of difference do you think it will make?